wow

ok so i think ive established already that im bad at up dating! its July 20th, in 9 days my daughter will be 1 year old!!! its crazy!!!
Araija, you're everything to me. this first year with you has been amazing. youve completely turned my life around and have made me a better person. everything that i want to be is because of you. im so glad that youre a part of my world, i couldn't imagine life without you now! i love that you still cuddle like you did when you were only 5 lbs! and your hair is finally growing back in! it's so soft! you've got such a personality! youre cute on purpose, silly, and goofy! but when you don't get your way.. LOOK OUT. hehehe, you've got quite the set of lungs on you!.
things that are cute:
- your toes, even you love them!
- the way that you've taken to scooting across the floor on your bum.
- the way that you grunt like a little gremlin!!!
- the touch then tickle game that you like playing when its bathtime.
- youve been taking to throwing your head back, squishing your eyes closed and giving an all tooth grin! hehe with all of your 8 teeth!
- the way you dont like arisol cans... hehe like hairspray or sunscreen.
- how you love each and every one of your teddy bears, and get so excited when you see them, then the hug that follows.
- when you try to steal MY teddy bear..... hahaha
- the faces you make when trying new food
- when i put your Baby Einstein movies on you are totally mesmerized.

its been a while

so its been a while since ive been able to post anything. i ended up having my daughter 6 weeks early at the end of July 2010. and so she just turned 7 months old. i went shopping today for a dress for myself. Araija is getting Baptized this Sunday so i needed something nice to wear.
I got a beautiful purple dress with a nice necklace and earrings. I love Pennington's <3 and Addition Elle <3
I've also been doing a lot of painting and am in the process of finishing another one for a friend. i hope that she likes it :D

Little Princess

I wrote this tonight... july 17th 2010

For my unborn daughter Araija im 32 weeks and 3 days pregnant. only 7.5 weeks left till my due date!
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Little Princess


All my dreams and visions I had of the world
are so much different now
from when I was a little girl

I always wanted to be the princess
that sat on her throne
awaiting my prince so I wouldn't be alone

I finally got my prince who rescued me
and I'm still not a princess
but I'm having his baby

A little princess inside of me grows
things have turned out so differently
who would have known

A love for someone so intimate and true
it's confusing to think
but I might have always loved you

Little princess, you've changed me so much
as long as you promise always to smile
I think I can forgive you for all the streach marks and such

I've been eagerly counting
the weeks up to 40
for the most life changing experience that will befall me

To hold you hand and to kiss your little nose
I love you little princess
more than you'll ever know.

babbby babby

Well im 25 weeks 6 days? or is it 26 weeks pregnant now. it's so hard to keep track. I know it's been a while since I posted anything but I'm trying to remedy that.

Im starting to feel my little girl more and more.. she's still much quieter then all of my other friends (who are pregnant) babies. Sometimes it worries me because I wont feel her move for couple days. but I have to keep telling myself that she has a sleeping pattern like her daddy: awake for a couple days, sleep for a couple days.

For the baby shower I've decided just to do a nice back yard thing on Sunday July 4th. Nothing fancy. I'm making the cake on my own , it's going to be a banana sour cream cake, shaped and colored like a lady bug <>

Oh, Baby.

In the past 5 months I've been doing a lot of discovering about myself and the kind of person that i want to be in life. I still have no idea what I want to do in terms of a career, if there's even such a thing anymore.

I've been doing a lot of reading and just as much listening; even if it's some advice that I didn't want and didn't nessecarily need. There is no end to advice when you're pregnant, wheather you want it or not. Someones always got something to say. Not that I don't appreciate most of the advice that's been given to me, because I do.. and I would probably be lost without it.

I'm kind of a bigger person. I stand at 5"9 and weighed around 190 lbs before I was pregnant. And for the past 5 months the only thing telling me that I was pregnant was occasional morning sickness, and no peroid. and of course the sonograms. I didn't feel my baby even a little bit untill just recently. I had my ultrasound last week and when i saw her little image on the screen part of me was floored. "that's really in me?... where?" as I looked down at my belly I couldn't really picture something the size of one of those really huuge tomato's and the length of a carrot actualy taking residence in my belly. i guess bigger girls don't feel it for longer than tinier girls would. im 21 weeks... over halfway done the whole pregnancy thing and still sometimes I dont feel like my body's changed much.

So now I'm starting to feel my little girl move around in me.. but still it's such a small feeling, and most times I can't even feel her at all. My fiance and I were laying in bed the other morning and hesaid that he felt her kick him.."are you sure?" I asked, because I can't feel anything at all.. oh well at least one of us can feel her.
I bought a whole bunch of Born Free glass bottles a few days ago.. they're BPA free and have a special air filter in the lid to make it so that only milk passes through to the nipple and no air, which is apparently a great cause for colic in babies. What baby wants to have gas?

Books on the mind

Wow, so i actually remembered that i had a blog. Life's been pretty crazy for the past 2 years. and things are only starting to calm down now.
I find ive been itching for something to do with myself. And the only thing that I keep coming back to is the possibility of writing a story. a Novel. it's something that ive always wanted to do. I have a problem though.... I can never seem to stay motivated long enough. maybe it's that i havnt figured out something interesting enough to myself to write about ?
When i think about writing... i think i would like to write about something that would give me pleasure to read.
Im listening to All The Things She Said - Tatu right now. and i can't help but think of their struggles that they must have ovecome and how many times that they had to screw up before they got something right. The song is about a war within theirselves and with everyone around them because they cant help who they love.

And i think that maybe its the same thing with everything... a war within yourself and with everyone around to do what you love or to fight for what you love. but i have to get a grasp at that love first. i havnt found something that id love to write.
ive had many ideas but could never carry through with any of them.

I just finished reading books 1 -6 of the House of Night series by P.C Cast & Kiersten Cast. The books cast a spell on me ;) ..... lol cast and cast :P
I learned that i loved to read when i was in grade 8 when i read Harry Potter and the Escape From Azkaban. I don't know why i started with book 3 but i did. i saw the book and when i brushed my fingers along the spine, it reaked of the magick within. I was hooked.
I read the whole series. and had the last book delivered to my front door on the day of its release.
I found that i hated movies about novels after i'd read the book. they never make it right and they always leave out SO much information that you feel like they've robbed you.
I decided firmly that i felt this way after seeing Eragon. I had already read the book and the second book of the triligy. i still need to get Brisinger. The next signifigant book series that came into my life was Twilight by Stephanie Mayer.
I loved Twilight. But i hated New moon, i couldnt stand how pathetic Bella was in it and how she went stupid crazy. I'd like to think that Twilight changed my view on fantasy books though.
So after i finished the House Of Night series(which by the way totally changed how i saw vampires and opened many door in my mind for how they can be and not what they've typically been in the past century) i went on to read City Of Bones by Cassandra Clare. Im not done reading this book yet. in about half way through it. and so far i love it ... how she put so much thought into crossing a magical invisible world with our own world, that only people with the Sight could see.
When i think about fantasey books.. theyre always about teenagers... and why is it that that seems normal to me? i'd like to read about someone my own age. im 21. something a little more mature. but when i think of writing a book the characters are always teenagers... maybe thats why i cant stay interested? because there's always another vampire story about a teenager.
Then i thought about a book i read ( a romance book.. with a bit of soul-finding) called Good In Bed by Jennifer Weiner. i used to read alot of romance novels when i was younger and in dreams of what the perfect man would be like.. so this was new for me in the midst of my collection of fantesy novels. I loved how it was about a bigger girl. because im not the tiniest girl myself. never have been. I stand at 5'11 and weight around 190 pounds. and yes thats my real weight.
But i dont think i would like to write about an obese vampire :P lol. nor would it interest me to read.
So ive figured out that if i write something it needs to be about someone thats older and a little more mature... but someone with a bit of funny in them. :) but changing the age of the character totally changes the mind set and storyline of the character.... but maybe thats a good thing? i would have to change everything from how he/she was raised to what thy did everyday.
hmm well i guess thats some food for thought.

well i know that its been QUITE some time since my last post... so ill give you jus a lil insight. ummm welll my computer broke and then dave and i split... he took half of everything i owned. riped me off about a thousand dollars... and stole my beer.
i went through this whole men better stay away from me stage and then my friend started liking me which kinda scared me. long story short on that aspect... well i told him that i wasnt ready for a relationship... but that kinda backfired on me when i showed up to a party with this guy that i like right now. man did he ever glare at us... it was actually kinda hilarious how immature it all was. like he was being emo and depressing the whole night and was acting like a 14 year old about the situation. (by the way he's like 3 years older than i am)
So yeah i also turned 19 this past june 23rd. the big one. very special birthday. it was great.
and also my bike just recently got stolen. but its ok... a friend bought me a new one. and i started classes for the new semester today.

well thats all for now. have a great night.

C.Blossom